If the 2020 news cycle hadn’t ripped every bit of life out of my sweatpants, seasonally depressed body, celebrities would have gotten all that was left. And I loved celebrities! I loved their stupid little Instagram captions and their stupid little Gucci-wearing toddlers. The best! Then at some point this year I got tired of seeing her roaming around on my wish-list in a private jet, moaning at the Architectural Digest spreads they call chez moi, and using their wealth and platforms to … for newly launched products to advertise beauty lines. Sometimes with the same name, sometimes in a sneaky disguise, everyone has a beauty line these days. Yes, even Anthony Hopkins. Even eleven of strange things. I would list everything that has been launched in the past couple of years, but honestly there are too many and so few that are noteworthy.
In the interests of fairness, I admit this is only a cursory review.
I’m sure a deeper dive into celebrity lines would produce some real winners. They’re made by real cosmetic chemists, after all – no matter how involved a celebrity may be, they leave the formulation to the professionals. (There’s no way Lady Gaga could conjure up mass-market eyeshadow in her guest bathroom, you know?) And I’ll be the first to make a point of using some famous beauty products: Rihanna’s bronzer, Drew Barrymore’s lip mask, Venus Williams ‘sunscreen … I’ve heard good things about Tracee Ellis Ross’ hair care, and great things about Ariana Grande’s fragrance (supposedly a cheater on Maison Francis Kurkdjian’s Baccarat Rouge for less than a third the price).
But honestly, good products seem to be secondary. It’s more like my roommate is adamant about not wanting to have children – not because she doesn’t like children, but because there are already lots of children. Couldn’t celebrities just do what they did before 2020 instead of bringing another business into the world? Give shine to the makeup artists, hairdressers, chemists, dermatologists, and surgeons who actually contributed to this visual symphony! And why, when branching out into beauty, do they always have to start with a million SKUs? The spaghetti thrown against a wall isn’t exactly the most efficient (or sustainable).
Anyway, that’s my opinion. But maybe it just feels like the beauty of celebrities is beating me up because I’m overconscious every time someone else has been catapulted onto the interwebs. However, I’m curious if people whose job it is not to keep up with this stuff are also feeling the fatigue. Are Any Celebrity Products Really Amazing? Or should they all produce alcohol again at medium prices? Let’s make this clear in the comments: If you love a celebrity endorsed product, please include your sources.
Photo via ITG